The theme of the workshop means that one meeting can be attended by different people who can work on saying goodbye to something old and building a new reality in which they will be able to feel fine. It can be participated by people who got divorced or are planning to get divorced, whose relationship ended, who lost someone close, their job or company.
Every such change is something big and a large source of stress because each and every one of them brings changes to basic needs of a human being.
It is a change of basic ties if it is about losing someone close.
It is a loss of security if it is about losing a job.
It is a loss of social position, self-esteem and financial security if it is about losing a company.
In the event of a divorce, it is about a loss of relationship, feeling of safety, sometimes about losing a social position. Of course, everyone reacts to such events in a unique way. In general, everyone reacts differently.
In the event of a change, it is appropriate to:
A) Plan it or accept that is has already happened.
B) Deal with it.
C) Create a new reality in which needs are satisfied at an earlier or another stage.
Ideally, after a change (divorce, break-up, loss of someone close) the stage on which needs are satisfied should be higher but, usually in the beginning of such a change, it is definitely lower than before.
There are many people who have never ended grieving the death of another person, the break-up of a relationship or friendship.
A strategy in which we live in the old and new at the same time is a dual situation of suspension and entanglement.
It is unclear if a relationship is over because the couple still spend holidays and time together.
It is unclear if a couple have broken up because they run a business together and have not split its assets. It is unclear if a couple have broken up because of thoughts, feelings, talks and deliberations about the partner. In such a situation, it is hard to create something else in life.
We talk about and feel stagnation. Instead of lasting a year (which is often enough to close the process), the grieving period takes longer and one is stuck in various aspects of old reality. It is important to settle legal, financial, emotional, social and family issues.
In regards to a divorce: generally, to make a divorce happen, the following need to take place:
A) Realise why do you want to end a relationship and decide to get a divorce
B) The decision must be made before you lose the chance to rebuild your life.
C) In principle, support within the family system is needed to complete a divorce.
D) The person who wants such a change must be aware that it will take time and money, that he/she will need to contact a lawyer, see a doctor and receive psychological support.
E) It is essential to draw conclusions regarding your own involvement in the situation at hand.
A) writing down the reasons for your decision, e.g. a crisis in marriage which lasted for several years and could not be resolved.
B) there was no common opinion on raising children
C) the partner did not accept what you did because in his/her world “everything sucks”
It needs to be taken into account that a divorce requires physical and mental effort.
Usually, you need to feel strong if you want to end a relationship. It does not mean that there is no point going for a change in another situation ... however, such a decision has its consequences.
Talk with important family members and tell them that you are planning a divorce. You will need their acceptance (at least partial or passive acceptance) before, during and a year after the divorce.
Apart from time, money, legal and mental support, you may need new skills, e.g. you will have to learn to pay the bills, deal with administrative and official issues even if you have not done it before. Knowing how your body or your child’s body may react to prolonged stress periods because of a divorce may protect your health and keep you independent from medical institutions. At ADITUS, we also carry out consultations and organise therapy workshops for people who want to successfully end an old relationship and create a new one.
In principle, psychological work is needed. It is focused on co-participation in a difficult relationship. Why did the relationship last this long?
What was my involvement in it?
Why did I enter into a relationship with such a person?
A) Perhaps, my parents’ relationship was similar - the father was a cold person and the mother could not handle her emotions
B) Perhaps, the mother married the father out of convenience but inside she still missed her first love
C) Perhaps, I did not feel loved as a child and some time later I thought that I am not loved in a relationship, as well. This might be a mature and realistic statement.
D) Perhaps, I chose the partner because I had an illusion that he/she would always protect me in social situations with his/her strength and relieve my social fear.
Whatever the result of our work is, it is important not to skip this stage and take responsibility for your development and decision.
15-16 November 2019, 10:00-18:00 (Friday-Saturday)
Recipients of the workshop:
Those who want to build a satisfying relationship.
Those who want to analyse their thoughts on relationships.
Those who got divorced or are planning to get divorced, got separated, who lost someone close, their job or company.
Conditions of participation:
Contestants are required to make a prepayment of PLN 300 either in person or by means of a bank transfer 10 days before the workshop begins.
Respecting the terms of the therapy contract.
An on-line or personal consultation with one of the therapists working at the Centre is required for all contestants who have never had therapeutic sessions with Teresa Ossowska (payment is due for the consultation).
The patients take responsibility for themselves and their therapy (Adult position).
Attendance is required throughout the entire
ADITUS Ośrodek Psychoterapii
i Rehabilitacji Psychicznej
Madalińskiego 67/2, Warszawa
(please leave your contact number) .
or via phone
+48 608 529 968 ,
I also answer text messages
+48 503 081 181 (preferably text) or
900 zł Constellations
400 zł Observer
in cash or via bank transfer:
Teresa Ossowska Ośrodek Psychoterapii
98 1240 6133 1111 0000 4806 8022